Shit My Gay Best Friend Says!

Me (referring to karate): Do you have a black belt?

My Gay Best Friend: In karate or like as an accessory?

My Gay Best Friend (on Britney Spears’ new single): I heard it on Perez and didn’t fall in love. But I’m gay so I guess I have to.

Hey guys, just wanted to let you know we’re back from our winter vacation. In my case it was filled with lots of instant netflix and trashy shows on E…

Let the posting continue! 

xoxo

The Dream Team

My Gay Best Friend (while playing with my hair): Why don’t you ever do anything with your hair?

Me: I don’t even know how to braid my hair.

My Gay Best Friend: Oh my God, it’s a gay man’s worst nightmare.

After watching the scene from Scott Pilgrim, where he defeats the evil ex-girlfriend by poking the back of her knee

My Gay Best Friend: …and now I’m afraid of girl’s knees.

Me: Why?

My Gay Best Friend: Coz… female orgasms… *shudders*

Me: And now you associate the two?

My Gay Best Friend: Yes.

Me: You know that isn’t actually how it works…

My Gay Best Friend: I don’t wanna know! And get your knee away from me!

My Gay Best Friend: Omg this shit is hilarious. It makes me want to go out and make fun of people.

My Best Friend: Why? Making fun of people is mean.

My Gay Best Friend: Only if you say it to their face, besides its called constructive criticism and I got made fun of all the time now look at me, I’m a bad bitch!

My Best Friend: Making fun of someone is NOT constructive criticism. It’s plain mean.

MY Gay Best Friend: And that’s why you’re not gay- because we can make getting made fun of sound like a good thing.

Gay Best Friend 1: You know… you’re just a lesbian in progress.
Gay Best Friends 2 and 3: Yeah, I can see it, too.
Me:..The flannel gives it away, huh? 

My Gay Best Friend (After seeing his own reflection in a window): Wow, for a second I was like, ‘Who is that cute boy?’ Then I realized, ‘Oh! Ha! That’s me!’

My Gay Best Friend: When i see a superman symbol i think of Jesus, not Jesus from the bible, Jesus from Godspell. It is quite apparent I am gay.

My Gay Best Friend: Today I bought Beyonce’s I Am…Sasha Fierce and a Devil Wears Prada/27 Dresses Combo DVD. I am not straight.